Saturday, December 18, 2004

Vera



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"That's just not funny."

Vera never made it to Judy's dinner party. They found her mutilated body in her living room the next morning.

"Who do you think it was, Pete?"

"A dust bunny. Those devils."

Don't make the same mistake Vera did. Call today.


Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Lester


Zere ees sohmting een zee way she cahrries hehrself. Hehr postyur--eet haunts my mind. Zee ten-shee-ahn ohv her elbows, zee shmi-uhl zat nevah leaves her leeps, her purfectly formed, feet. Ah, Zhudy, eef you only knew how much I long for your deeleeceeose . . .






eh-hem,






deveeled eggs.

Saturday, November 13, 2004

Judy



"Ok, the guests are going to be here any minute. I've got Dixie plates and those little wienies... Oh darn! I know I've forgotten something..."




"Oh heavens! I left the deviled eggs at Darlene's!"

Saturday, November 06, 2004

Phil


Posted by Hello
"Another party at Judy's... ach!" screamed Phil. "As if I didn't already do enough pandering to those latte-sippin, pandering (did I already soliloquize 'pandering'?) panderers. And all I have to wear is my high-chroma tuxedo! The low-chroma's at the cleaners! Darn!"


Posted by Hello
"Don't hate me because I'm still beautiful in high chroma. Hate me because my eyes are painted on, and I never blink! Never!"